It's 4 a.m. and you're jolted awake by a nightmare you were having: humanoid pigs chasing you with cleavers. Whatever, work is in a couple hours anyways so you get up and abruptly smash your pinky toe into the shelf. There's no expression on your face. A quiet whimper is all you can muster because you're too tired to react.

The hot shower soothes your Christ-like pain, then you realize you forgot the towel. You start to sob and accidentally let out a fart, but because of the water it sounds like a quack.

Finally you're back in bed nice and clean, in the peace and quiet you ask yourself, "Does God even exist?"

I present to you knowledge of his existence, one of the most important things you'll need in order to obtain spiritual growth. These are straight forward observations that will show you a God resides right above us in the zenith of heaven.

The designs around us have hidden functions and meaning; these things must be observed until their truths are realized unto epiphany. For instance, when you look at a bowl of fruit all you see is fruit, but in reality they are candy for your taste buds.

Hosea 6:6: For I desired mercy, and not sacrifice; and the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings.